Celebrity Cruise 2017 - Don't Forget Your Sandals

Road Trip and 14 Night Celebrity Cruise

Day 1 (Toronto, Ontario, CA to Charlotte, North Carolina, USA)

Busy is an understatement for our last couple weeks - recently moving into a new unfurnished condo and working additional shifts to arrange 3 weeks off together for this vacation... It has been a state of perpetual sleep deprivation and controlled chaos. So what were we thinking the day before we depart...

Well, instead of packing and prepping for the 3 day road trip and 2 week Celebrity cruise, Andrew found himself distracted with his 8th shift in 9 days. With thoughts of everything still left to do I, after finishing my 8th 12 hour shift in 10 days, spent the day procrastinating by grooming the puppies and searching for what I hoped to be that perfect last minute outfit. The sun was setting as I left the mall, sans piece de resistance, but arms full with new bath towels and Victoria Secret travel accessories.

I arrived back at the new condo to find Andrew already home. We unloaded our vehicles to discover our guilty pleasure indulgence (Kettle Chips Jalapeno flavour) was a road trip necessity - we both pulled out bags as a surprise to each other. We laughed that nothing on our "to do" list was done, but we had chips!

Before we got to delirious exhaustion, we switched gears and shifted into productivity mode. Jenn dropped by to help assemble our Pack for a Purpose school supply kits while we packed and prepped food. It was 2 AM before we fell into bed for 2 hours of coma-like sleep before the alarm sounded.

By 5:30 AM we were on the road... with more than 1200 km planned for today's stint. Sleeping every chance we weren't in the pilot seat, the hours and scenery slipped by. Making 2 brief stops, once to fuel the car, the other to re-fuel ourselves with packed lunches; both times to relieve our bladders.

12 hours and 5 US States (New York, Pennsylvania, West Virginia, Virginia, and North Carolina) later, we checked in at the DoubleTree in Charlotte, North Carolina. The only priority on our mind - food and sleep.

Highlights of the Day:

Neck Pillow - made for some exceptional car napping
Virginia's mountain tunnels - it may have been the only part of the day we were simultaneously awake
Travelling on USA Thanksgiving - the cars on the road were sparse and there was NO road work (construction)
Yup, that's about it... the rest of the day was a blur

Lessons learned:

While we may have mastered last minute packing before flying, it is NOT a good strategy when you have to be the pilot for a road trip
We need to keep a pair of Sandals in Andrew's luggage - I kid you not... he almost forgot his sandals (again)

Day 2 (Charlotte, NC to Melbourne, FL) - November 24, 2017

Oops... forgot to delete the 4 AM work alarm, so that was an unpleasant wake up. BUT on the plus side, dove right back into a couple more hours of heavenly sleep.

While the Charlotte DoubleTree made for a uniquely bold multi-coloured decor experience (that's our polite way of implying a more subdued remodel would be appreciated), it had the benefits of being affordable, clean, and within minutes of Hwy I-77S. Within 10 minutes of leaving, we were in South Carolina - needless to say, we felt quite accomplished having already been in 2 States before 8 AM.

Compared to yesterday, today's 8.5 hour drive felt like a breeze - minus Florida's slow moving traffic along the I-95 below the I-295 (mostly due to backed up off-ramps near outlet malls). The Hilton Rialto Melbourne had a clean modern lobby and prompt service. Room 405 might have had a view of the roof below, but was clean and updated. The day had become completely overcast with drizzling rain, so instead of beaches, we opted for a 6er of Kona beer (Hawaiian - we couldn’t find local or imported singles) with in-room dinner and a movie (finally seeing The Accountant in its entirety).

The pre-bed shower is where things took a turn for the worse... We were mid-shower and all sudsed up when we realized the drain had not kept up with the incredible water pressure. Forced to turn off the shower to avoid flooding the bathroom, we checked in with the front desk and awaited keys for a new room to be delivered. Fifteen minutes later, a soft incessant knock on the door - keys and the comment "Here ya go, 309, it's a junior suite". Verdict - suite... not so sweet. The smell of mould and small black circles on the ceiling combined with the dark dingy space paired with closet doors that were angled and dangerously close to falling off just didn't do it for us. So... To the lobby we went, half dressed and still damp. Edwin re-located us to the 8th Executive floor 813 (which really equates to a higher elevation + mouthwash and shoe cleaner in the bathroom). The shower worked and we slipped into bed.

What the f*ck? Ear piercing alarm - not our phone - and loudspeaker voice insisting on immediate evacuation due to a fire alarm. My little heart started racing as Andrew climbed out of bed... I was already up, launched myself out of bed as if it was an alarm for an air raid attack. Such a strong flight or fight response, I'm bent over trying to calm my heart, now losing hearing in 1 ear, knowing I might pass out if I don't pull myself together. I turned my attention to passing Andrew clothes (shh... he was naked) and we hurried out the door leaving the unimportant bags behind. Down 8 flights of stairs to exit the hotel to wait in the parking lot. Taking a breath we looked at the time - only 1 AM? It felt much later. The fire trucks arrived... and eventually the police. We were allowed back into the lobby where we waited even longer. No fire, but a sprinkler head on the 6th floor somehow started spewing water flooding 6 floors dangerously close to all room electrical panels. Our wing of the hotel was unable to return to our rooms for fear of electrocution until power shutdown could be isolated to involved rooms.

The truth came out...someone hung something from the sprinkler on the 6th floor. You know the sprinkler head with the picture saying don't hang anything from me? Yeah that one.

Rumours of not being able to return until tomorrow prompted us to sneak up to the 8th floor. We were greeted by a firefighter... luckily the floor had just been cleared so we retrieved our belongings and went back to the lobby just after the building (minus affected rooms) had been given the all clear. Ensuring our stay would be comped, we returned to 813. Not trusting everything would be fine, it was some hours before we fell back to sleep - still fully clothed.

Highlights of the day:

Black Friday - kept drivers in parking lots and off the highways
Only in America - Highway billboard ad "Jingle Bells, Shotgun Shells"

Day 3 (Melbourne to Miami, FL) - November 25, 2017

After a total of 1535 miles - Miami, Florida!

We pulled into the DoubleTree Miami (Biscayne) well before check-in, so Andrew headed inside while I waited with the car in the "10min courtesy parking" lane. Suddenly, the driver side door swung open and a stranger began to climb in... I thought to myself - Seriously? We have been in Miami less than 5 minutes and someone is trying to car-jack us? I hurled myself toward the driver door to pull it closed as I insisted the man to get out of the car. It was only as the man backed away that I realized it was a valet parking attendant. Oops... my bad.

Andrew returned with room keys to 648 - and it was like deja vu from the previous day, only with different challenges. This first room smelt of cigarette smoke, unpleasant, but we hoped it would dissipate with time. However, being nearly naked and having 2 hotel attendants barge into the room unannounced was inexcusable. (...and sadly not the first time we have had this happen at a hotel - Broome, Australia).

We were shifted to 844, which had its own flaws. A drop ceiling covered with water stains and a safe with low batteries that we couldn't arm forcing us to carry all valuables with us. It was the malfunctioning air conditioning that sent us back down to the lobby.

Finally, 3rd time's a charm - Hilton Honours floor 756. And a duty manager discount on the room rate to apologize for the inconvenience.

Between the room switches, we found time for 3 hours of walking to and from Miami Beach (with a bit of help from the FREE trolley bus on the island). If you're not driving an expensive car, grab the trolley, or rent a bike. CitiBike rentals start at $4.50/30 minutes. An Uber from Miami Beach to the DoubleTree would cost $5.00. We always like FREE, though tonight it cost us in time... The trolley is wheelchair accessible - impressive and accommodating right? Yes... until people in wheelchairs getting off the bus collide with wheelchair users getting on the bus and eventually someone gets their wheelchair stuck on the exit ramp causing significant delays (with no alternate exit off the bus).

Day 4 (Embark Celebrity) - November 26, 2017

Finally, a night's sleep without interruption. A quick BBM Face chat with family, followed by a luxurious shower for two (the water pressure in Florida Hilton brand hotels is impressive). Check-out was smooth with a 30% discount for the multiple deficiencies and inconvenience of having to switch rooms 3 times. We were able to incorporate the $30 valet parking fee into the same bill. In the future, we would park elsewhere - other lots had parking for $10-15.

Tried to hold back laughter as Andrew became increasingly frustrated over having to circle back between Miami and Miami beach (island) TWICE while trying to find the way to the port of Miami. Andrew struggled with the situation, wondering how 2 intelligent individuals with GPS could get this wrong. Lol... sorry completely giggling as I type this. Each time, we thought we made the right turn, only to discover we had put ourselves back on the bridge to the wrong island. We could see the ship (Celebrity Eclipse), but spent an extra 20 minutes passes by it on the wrong bridge. Finally, we found parking at the port directly across from terminal 'G' for $20/day (the price increases on December 1, 2017 to $22/day).

Embarkation was equally frustrating. We felt compelled to tip the porter responsible for ensuring our bags made it onto the ship. This guy was raking in the money. Who wouldn't tip when being asked to give money, especially when you're about to walk away from your luggage to check-in and board the ship?

After checking in (and yes - we did express online check-in, but aren't convinced it helped speed up the process), we realized an itinerary change letter had been slipped into our hands while embarking. St. Lucia was swapped out for Martinique due to "pier construction" and Celebrity opting not to tender guests. Huge disappointment, as we had made plans to stay at our favourite resort (Sandals Grande St. Lucian) for the day and catch up with our friend MacGyver. We immediately found our way to the Guest Relations desk (Deck 3) to request compensation... Stay tuned for outcome. Guest relations was able to note food allergies and preferences. We learned that with 24 hours notice, Celebrity is willing to alter meals to meet allergy needs to satisfy travellers' preferences. Next time, we will contact special_needs@rccl.com to provide pre-cruise food allergies and dietary restrictions.

The day slipped by quickly as we explored most of the ships' 15 floors. Lunch was available at the Oceanview Cafe (buffet) or Mast Grill (burgers, hot dogs, fries) with the healthy option (AquaSpa Cafe) closed today and both Blu and Luminae off limits for non-suite guests. Ramesh at the Oceanview Cafe took us through the buffet and pointed out a vast assortment of gluten free options.

Before our 8:30pm set dining reservation at the Moonlight Sonata (main dinner venue), we stopped by the Martini Bar for a Pomegranate Martini - delicious! Claire, the maitre d' at Moonlight Sonata seated us at table #127. Another couple similar in age, were seated not 6" away from us - we all smiled at the tiny gap separating our tables. As it turns out, both ladies have a long list of allergies, so it made for an easy share of the next day's menu to pre-order meals. Our Filipino waiter Ruben, was both attentive and amusing.

Dropped in on a port shopping seminar - really went for the free charm bracelet from Diamonds International; thought it would be fun to collect the free charms at most ports and have a souvenir for our niece. The ship's personal shopper Danielle would be helpful if looking to shop in each port, but since it isn't our priority we opted out of the chance to win a diamond and left early to explore the ship.

Another visit to Guest Relations to further discuss the options available to remedy our disappointment at having had St. Lucia taken off the itinerary. No outcome yet...

Evening chic tonight with pre-dinner Blue Wave martini (Martini Bar) and beer tasting (Passport Bar). Learned to arrive 5-10 minutes late for dinner as the crowd of guests pouring into Moonlight Sonata at 8:30 PM (2nd seating) was overwhelming. Joined by our table mates (6" separation neighbours) - we shared a few more exchanges with these Norwegians! Loved the gluten free shrimp scampi and rack of lamb.

Claire, the amazing maitre d' was on point again with her beautiful British accent - taking our advance meal orders to accommodate allergies and making us feel incredibly welcome. It was cute when Claire discretely offered a table for four, as she couldn't help but notice we're "getting on well" with our new friends. We politely declined - not wanting to impose on our Norwegian table neighbours... and feeling safe with that small gap between us. Lol...

Before slipping back in to our stateroom, we stopped by Cafe al Bacio for hot water and a delicious treat (...would have been even better if Andrew's didn't have a small piece of plastic in it).

Day 6 (Day 2 - At Sea) - November 28, 2017

Okay, so this kid needs to have a strict 1 alcoholic drink policy. Because after that I'm just a mess. Probably shouldn't be typing today's events right now either... but I am. I sent Andrew to find the adorable mini day planner for a scrap book. It's okay though - he's 2 shots into Laphroaig and things are spinning if he sits still.

Let me tell you - today was amazing. Minus the condescending rude waiter Alfredo at lunch (we shared our distaste for his conduct and promptly took ourselves elsewhere). We enjoyed our Caribbean favourite - Coconut sorbet. We lazed out on the grass on deck 15... A sun's out, guns out kinda afternoon. Though my "guns" were secured beneath a strapless bikini. Andrew savoured his favourite Alec Bradley cigar (Black Market).

Day 7 (Day 3 - St. Kitts) - November 29, 2017

7 AM wake up... reached for the curtains to sneak a peak outside - ISLAND! St. Kitts. Rushed out onto the balcony to capture a few shots... that must be the volcano we're going to climb! With any luck the sun will break through the overhanging clouds by the time we reach the peak... for now it gifted a beautiful rainbow.

Breakfast at the Oceanview Cafe (buffet) offered delicious fresh tropical fruits, made to order eggs, and more...

The Mount Liamuiga Shore Excursion was well organized through Celebrity. We exited as a group onto the pier and were quickly met by local guides with pick up trucks with converted beds for transport. We really worked on tightening the lap belt, especially after having to sign a lengthy release of liability... from injury or death. Driving along the coast was beautiful... almost made you forget about the insane driving style of St. Kittians - until the unmistakable squealing of tires, followed by the crash of metal against metal, then silence. We narrowly missed the rear end collision that happened on the opposite side of the road right in front of our eyes. Close call, reminiscent of the accident during our Kauai, Hawaii Mud Bug excursion.

We started the climb at 750 feet above sea level with the peak sitting some 2800 feet above sea level. Mount Liamaiga is a volcano (currently inactive). After having climbed the piton in St. Lucia, we were expecting a comparable level of incline and difficulty, especially with the advisory of "Extremely Strenuous" on the tickets. However, Paul the lead guide took a relaxed pace, stopping frequently to check on the group (aka any slow pokes) in addition to the 6 pre-set rest stops. We would have preferred an accelerated version of the hike, but did enjoy the opportunity to learn about the edible and medicinal plant species (fiddleheads, mangos, hearts of palm, birds nest fern, tree sap, etc), spot monkeys, and meet some interesting people (Alabama Military, New York Glass Blower, some Brits, and a couple from Quebec). We would recommend the excursion, but don't have big expectations for the lunch - it was build your own ham and cheese sandwiches off the tail of the truck. Island style.

Back on the ship we ordered room service,where BLTs on gluten free raisin bread was strangely tasty... Celebrity (like Paul Gauguin) either gets a serious discount on gluten free raisin bread or really thinks it goes with everything.

Found time for a workout in the gym... starring out the windows as the island drifted into the distance with the sun setting. Then... the most incredible thing - the Green Flash. In complete contrast to what we've been told... the horizon was not free of cloud. Both Andrew and I saw the unmistakable horizontal green light flash just before the sun sank beneath the horizon.

Pre-dinner martini - French 75 may very well be the winner - favourite martini! Slightly sour from lemon, but a sweetness from simple syrup and gin balanced with sparkling wine! Andrew snuck in 2 more beers... then to Moonlight Sonata (main dining) for Steak & Frites. Service was slow, but we patiently waited for what we expected to be an unforgettable strip steak. Oh no... what was presented to us was simply comical. We stared at 3 slices of beef and I kid you not, 6 fries... We glanced at each other in disbelief. Andrew had already sampled a wedge salad that might have had 1 diced cherry tomato and 2 thin slices of egg with no dressing. This guy is going to wither away to nothing. The steak was tough and gamey. And we are terrible liars, so when the manager happened by and asked how our meal was, we provided honest feedback. Our Norwegian table neighbours managed to keep a straight face as they offered a "spectacularly polite lie" about their steak... then turned to us and laughed at how unpalatable and stingy the meal was. After Andrew sampled chocolate cake and Krissy tasted her "special" dessert (flavoured mousse with peaches), we headed up to the Oceanview Cafe (buffet) for the late night offering. Gluten free pasta, pizza, and strawberry chiffon cake - delicious!

Day 8 (Day 4 - Antigua) - November 30, 2017

Sailed into Antigua's St. John's port today. Enjoyed omelettes on the balcony and packed gluten free muffins in containers we brought for a make shift picnic lunch (aka feeling frugal). Docked at 8 AM and off the boat without a lineup before 8:30 AM. Had a moment of concern when nobody at the Tourist Info desk had heard of Caribbean Rentals, but all was fine when Elwin from Chase rentals arrived with the white Jeep Wrangler. You don't want to forget where you park... almost all the cars seem to be white - Caribbean car colour of choice.

Carlisle Bay, Cades Reef, and Darkwood are all along this stretch of the island and all noted for snorkelling. We now know that although Antigua has 365 beaches, some are difficult to reach by land due to the inland swamps. After nearly exhausting our patience in the heat, we settled on a parking spot just off the road and walked a few steps onto the sandy beach and into the water. Snorkelling was fun, though we were mostly staring at the sandy bottom (and nothing else). Guess we were too far away from a reef.

With a couple hours to spare, we travelled up the West Coast and beyond to Dickenson’s Bay in the North. Dropped by the Sandals resort - still closed for "maintenance" (aka government taxation dispute), but strolled along that beach briefly.

Fuelled up with gas on the way back to the terminal. $70 Eastern Caribbean - they don't take credit or debit and the US dollar is exchanged at 2.6x, so we received $60 XCD back from a $50 US bill. Pricey!

The line to return to the cruise ship seemed about a half mile long, but it moved quickly and there was NO wait time to re-board. Before we sailed away, we had room service delivered for a late lunch on the balcony... and a lot of water.

Dinner was interesting. Qsine - 1 of 4 specialty restaurants was a 2.5h ordeal. In fact, we closed out the restaurant. The uniquely served tapas style dishes provided an opportunity to try cuisine from India (papadum, masala, samosa), Asia (stir fry, kung pow shrimp, black pepper beef), Greece (lamb, tzatziki, olives, falafel), Mexico (fresh guacamole, tacos), and USA (lol - giving the US credit for the yummy hamburger sliders), etc...

While catering to allergies was notably very challenging (even with advance ordering), we stilled enjoyed the experience. Most important - LOVED the dessert: cheesecake, the "bullet" (gelato, not the sex toy), and a chocolate tower for Andrew.

Day 9 (Day 5 - Martinique) - December 1, 2017

First glance... first impression - that's a whole lot of island AND high rises? Wow. Hope they left a few palm trees. Martinique is apparently one of the largest in the Caribbean - about 425 square miles; comparable to Maui, Hawaii in the Pacific.

MacGyver, our St. Lucian friend, had arranged for his friend to meet us at the cruise port to spend the day touring us around Martinique. Andrew and I had narrowed in on a rum distillery in Macouba (northern part of the island), thinking it would be a scenic drive up the West Coast, then an afternoon of snorkelling near Les Trois-Islet (south west).

What's that saying about best laid plans? Lol... well we didn't see this coming. The "friend" still hadn't arrived after 1.5 hours of waiting and pacing the taxi lanes. Apparently "Tim" was waiting at the wrong port. We gave up waiting when we realized Tim was on foot without a vehicle. I don't know if he planned to piggyback us around the island, but this plan had completely disintegrated. With a car rental being extremely pricey, especially given the currency being Euros, we instead opted to walk 10 minutes to the left of the cruise port and paid $7 (USD) each for roundtrip ferry to both Anse L'ane and Anse Mitan. We were knee deep in the green coloured waters of Anse L'ane when a kind Frenchman provided valuable insight (and Krissy did her best to interpret and speak French). Long story short - we grabbed the ferry back to Anse Mitan where the water was clearer blue with an abundance of fish (poisson). Even had the chance to see an octopus! Then... the rain. It poured - reducing visibility, but providing an intimate opportunity to clutch to each other beneath the palm leaves (after ensuring no coconuts were threatening to fall on us). It may very well be my most favourite moment thus far.

Us and A LOT of others crammed onto the ferry back to Fort de France - I couldn't help but laugh as the only available seat involved being unexpectedly and repeatedly showered with water rolling off the roof. It fell directly onto me (and only me).

Room service and a complimentary movie made for the perfect afternoon, especially with the Helipad sail away cancelled due to the thunderstorms that had started mid-afternoon. The lightning was nearly blinding and the thunder bellowed and echoed through the metal of the ship... Krissy gripped my arm tighter with every flash and boom - I just wish I didn't have the sunburn across my back and arms right now.

Enjoyed a leisurely breakfast (aka slow service) in Moonlight Sonata. Then down to deck 2 to exit the ship. Shuttle buses shifted passengers from the pier toward the port exit, but only after being funnelled through the shopping mall. Taxis and last minute tours abound at the port exit, but we were comfortable with the 30 minute walk to Carlisle Bay. Perhaps because it was Saturday or maybe just being a cruise ship day, the beaches were busy and every few hundred feet, a Bajan tried to entice us into a snorkel excursion to see the turtles. Some even boldly stating the turtles had "gone out further" and "there's no turtles if you snorkel from shore". Pay this no mind - within minutes of entering the crystal clear waters, we spotted our first turtle. Poor little guy - we were so excited to follow him that we almost forgot he would need to come up for air and our shadows above might be intimidating. We backed off and the turtle popped up to the surface to breathe. Then as if to thank us (or maybe get rid of us), the turtle led us to 2 other turtles. We hovered on the surface watching as the turtles crunched away.

Bonus - no need to spend extra money on food off the cruise ship. Re-board for a stellar buffet lunch, then head back out for round 2 on a different beach!

By 12 PM we were back on the ship for the best lunch so far. The Oceanview Cafe was featuring fish and chips, which I tried while Krissy filled her plate with Mexican (gluten free tacos), indian (chicken Korma and dhal), and Italian (pesto pizza). Gluten free cheery chiffon cake and ice cream finished the meal beautifully.

After re-applying sun block, we were back off the ship and headed in the opposite direction. The Mount Gay Rum Distillery was closed (Saturday), so we shifted to the nearest beach and spent the afternoon snorkelling and playing in the ocean. Thirty minutes back to the ship to re-board by 4 PM.

Evening chic tonight, with a date at the Martini Bar followed by dinner reservations at Sushi on Five (fingers crossed nothing's still alive when it reaches our table). Then, a comedic performance in the theater at 9 PM and likely a late night dessert (or two)... if we can stay awake long enough!

The sea has been calm and the overall experience has felt very blissful... starting to think about wanting to book another cruise!

Ps. Sushi on Five - a la carte - huge success! Can't wait to go back for the maki rolls.

Let's see... 6 AM alarm, 7 AM finally dragged ourselves out of bed, then gym, shower, and breakfast. The comedian Pete Matthews from last night's act sat beside us - chatted only briefly - slightly afraid the wrong comment might make us new material for his act.

Off the ship by 9:15 AM for the roundtrip $35 Water Taxi Celebrity shore excursion to Klein Bonaire - a flat round uninhabited amenity-free island reserve for turtles and aquatic life. It's situated only a short distance from Bonaire - a Dutch Caribbean island east of Central America and North of Venezuela with consistent 27°C weather. Wow!!! The drift snorkel from "No Name Beach" rivals French Polynesia.

The crystal clear waters with light shades of turquoise and vibrant deep blues, the abundance of fish and their bright colours, the healthy assortment of corals were all found only a few meters off the shoreline. It was so clear, you could see fish pooping - like tiny sand clouds parachuting into the depths.

We spent 2 hours snorkelling along the reef completely mesmerized! Then...OUCH... what was that? It's stinging... right in my elbow. Don't panic... probably a little jelly (bees of the seas). Out to shore and over to the excursion team - no numbness, disorientation, or difficulty breathing (trying to reassure myself). Andrew was distracted by the large lizards on the beach - apparently their defecation destination (the lizard dropped a turd at least 1/3 the size of its' body).

Anyway, the team had the perfect fix - better than vinegar... and NO not urine... a spray with lidocaine that did the trick in no time. Back in the water with the GoPro in my hands as the perfect distraction from the sting that was quickly fading. Rum punch was offered before the 12 PM boat ride back to the cruise ship pier. It couldn't have been more convenient.

Devoured burritos (gluten free = sans tortilla) and pesto pizzas for lunch before a couple scoops of banana and vanilla ice cream. A quick re-group and we were back out in Krajindik to rent a car for the afternoon. Settled on Caribe Car Rental - partly because it was open (the stores close for a leisurely lunch) and partly because Paulo kindly agreed to rent us a vehicle for the afternoon. Also, Caribe Car Rentals only rent new vehicles! If scooters were covered under our travel insurance, this would be the perfect island to scoot around (or cycle). But safety first for us - one Mitsubishi pick up truck coming right up. Since 2011, Bonaire's official currency is the US dollar.

Do not expect to see lush rainforest and volcanic mountains on Bonaire. It is an arid desert-like environment. Cacti abound and the flat island produces salt. The only mountains on this island are made of white salt. Bonaire also emphasizes preservation of wildlife. It is sanctuary to flamingos, sharks, turtles, and donkeys to name a few. We tried to get up close and personal with the pink flamingos that can be found in shallow waters just off the highway (aka narrow road wrapping around the island), but that didn't go as planned. Dozens flew away before Krissy got too close.

Lesson Learned:

Take time to really look at the map of the island before you get started. A lot of the road signs vary from those in North America. We found ourselves racing to get back into the city only to find ourselves facing a "Wrong Way, Turn Around" sign. Not only did we not get to drive back along the coast, we had to take the long way back.
While Bonaire's pastel buildings in the city center and flamingos were interesting to see, it's really all about being in or on the water here! Kite surfing, wind surfing... any kind of surfing and snorkelling or diving are your best bets!

Highlights:

Snorkel (or dive) in Bonaire! It's unreal! Even the water at the cruise port was clear with locals and tourists swimming from nearby beaches and piers.

Day 13 (Day 9 - Curacao) - December 5, 2017

Managed to burn a few calories at the gym first thing... not that climbing stairs on the ship all day isn't enough of a workout.

Bon Bini! Curacao! With the boat parked at the Dutch islands' Mega Pier near Willemstad (Otrobando and Punda) for an overnight stay, it was a brief walk to the Avis Car Rental for our 9 AM reservation. Unfortunately, at least 4 other couples seemed to have 9 AM reservations and arrived just before us. Talk about slow and tedious. We were practically in need of lunch before we even left the pier. At least the American foursome in front of us (New Jersey and Kansas City) were an amusing distraction. Always love learning about others' travels - this group had met on a snorkel excursion 4 years ago and still vacation together! We encouraged the Paul Gaugin cruise in French Polynesia they've been considering after their upcoming Greece and Italy trip.

An hour later, the Avis backup team arrived (don't get excited - that's 1 more employee and a dot matrix printer). The vehicle inspection was a joke as there were so many dents and dings. It was the kind of scenario where noting what wasn't damaged would have been faster. It reminded us of our rental car from Apex Car Rental in New Zealand (Click here). We opted to do a walk-around video as proof of the vehicle's initial state.

We hesitantly paid $12 USD via MasterCard for the Shete Boka National Park - not because we didn't want to spend the money (proceeds go toward protection of beaches used by sea turtles), but because of what the sign leading up to the entrance suggested. I missed it initially, but Andrew told me the sign said, "Your car will get broken into and you will get robbed if you enter"; which I repeated verbatim to the park attendant with serious concern. We were assured if we parked in the designated areas that we would be fine. Leaving no valuables behind, we waved politely at security perched in towers, like vehicle lifeguards, before starting each hike. So glad we didn't turn away. We spent nearly 2 hours capturing the natural beauty. Boka Wandomi (a natural bridge), Boka Pistol, Boka Kalki, and finally Boka Tabla (with cave). We paused at the exit to snap a picture of the intimidating sign... and I instantly understood why the park attendant had looked so confused. The sign had pictures eluding to the possibility of theft and robbery... Andrew laughed as I realized I had trustingly repeated his comical interpretation of the graphics.

For the afternoon, we thought part of the objective was to see the Ostrich farm; the 2nd biggest outside of Africa. However, when the rental car lacks a map, the tourist maps lack street names, and patchy internet paired with Google Maps' incomplete mapping for Curacao, the afternoon objective became just finding the f*cking farm. Got stuck in traffic on the on-ramp for the Queen Juliana Bridge that soars over the towns. Hard not to notice the smoke stacks and giant oil refinery. Correction - not traffic - broken down cube truck being towed away by a smaller flatbed truck. By the time we arrived at the Ostrich farm, we had run out of water and patience. Instead of spending nearly $20 USD for a ride around the farm or $50 USD each for an ATV tour, we caught a glimpse of a few small ostriches and called it a day. Having had more energy, Andrew might have been convinced to ride an ostrich for $35 USD (max weight 165 lbs). We found a direct route back to the ship and made note of the road names in case we (or you) go back!

Directions: After getting out of Otrobanda and across the Queen Juliana bridge, take SchottegatwegZuid to Schottegatweg Oost (in the Ring), then turn right onto Santa Rosaweg and stay on Kaminda Rignald before turning left onto Kaminda Mitologia. Take this road about 11 km and turn right onto the road toward St. Jurisbaai (the road with the signs for Aloe Vera Plantation, Ostrich Farm, Art, and Kite Surfing).

Parking directly on the pier in front of Avis with security was convenient, especially since we were so exhausted we barely stayed awake through dinner. Loving Ljuben (that's Lew-ben silent 'j') - so attentive and thoughtful. Found some energy to bring gluten free blueberry cake and lemon cheesecake back to the room. Guilty pleasures on vacation... and exactly why we hit the gym in the morning!

Day 14 (Day 10 Curacao) - December 6, 2017

It's always easier the 2nd time around. So that's just what we did! We took our little Kia Rio back around the island to the best beaches and snorkel sites we found yesterday. And... we brought little more than our snorkel gear and sandals (with a double Ziploc system for the cruise passes and car keys). Not only does Curacao give our guts cause for concern, the signage, the strong security presence at every tourist destination (beaches included), and other tourists' reviews are all highly suggestive of criminal acts being commonplace.

Moving back down the coast to the 2nd site - Playa Abou (near Knip)... with spectacular views overlooking the bay and steps leading directly onto the beach where lounge chairs, umbrellas, and drinks can be purchased. It's a busy spot, creating a safety in numbers feel. We spent nearly an hour snorkelling out deep into the waters and off toward the left of the bay to find a huge puffer fish (Krissy's favourite - she thinks they are so cute with their large eyes and plush selves). Resisting the urge to bother it and cause it to puff into a spiked ball, we enjoyed the sights with a look don't touch policy. Spent some time relaxing on the white sand beach... until the gust of wind that pelted us with sand acted as an invite to move along.

A short drive later, we arrived at Playa Jeremi... set within a bay with waters similar in appearance to Playa Abou. We thought about throwing on our gear and heading in for the 3rd snorkel of the morning, but we didn't. Lol - that's the best part of vacation - no explanation required for opting out. Bottom line, we were getting hungry and had plans to enjoy the buffet on the ship (free lunch), fuel up and return the rental car before exploring Punda on foot. There are too many 1-way streets and too much pedestrian traffic to make driving in Osterstad or Punda enjoyable.

It took 3 tries, but finally a gas station accepted our Canadian MasterCard. Curacao uses the Antilles Guilder (converts to about $1.7 USD)... we over-estimated and through the sliding drawer the attendant pushed back a handful of Guilder coins. Souvenirs!

Strolled along the path by the water and through the UNESCO Rif Fort to reach the floating Queen Emma Bridge to cross over to Punda. Picked up free crab charms from Diamonds International; we've been collecting the brass bracelet and charms at the different ports in the Caribbean. Dropped into a couple stores, but the prices were insultingly expensive. As we made our way back through narrow alleys toward the foot bridge, we caught the high police presence and noticed what can best be described as the calm before the storm. Unrest about to climax. The kind of scenario where you don't have to speak or understand the language to know there is tension and anger surfacing. Not needing to wait to confirm our suspicions, we promptly proceeded over the bridge and back toward the cruise ship via Rif Fort. We paused to climb to the top of the fort, and watched dozens of police in full riot gear marching across the foot bridge with police vehicles following. Suddenly the footbridge, which rests on pontoons, started rotating - a tug boat needed through - leaving the police and vehicles paused on the bridge until it rotated back. Sirens could be heard with angry chanting and yelling in the background. Civil unrest, but with such unreliable internet signal, we have no indication of the underlying problems. It was shocking to see tourists continue to cross over into the chaos as others quickly evacuated the area. We shifted our attention to returning to the cruise ship to unwind before the evening - a Thai massage for Andrew and the elliptical in the gym for me!

Instead of the lengthy walk and $150 USD pre-booked Budget car rental, we accepted the $50 USD Toyota Yaris rental immediately outside the pier exit. Within minutes we were heading south - with another minimally useful road map. Within 30 minutes we paused at Rodger’s Beach near the southern tip of Aruba - white sand beaches and snorkel potential. Noticed the large oil refinery and instead shifted toward the East Coast into the Arikok National Park ($11 US/person/day). Initially we planned to cut through the park on route 7, but this random stranger with an abundance of information about the park suggested making stops at 2 caves. Quadirikiri Cave had an unexpected surprise - bats! Tiny bats flying overhead made the experience really fun, especially with us fumbling for our footing in the dark and Andrew repeated saying "I'm Batman" in a deep Batman-esk voice.

The next cave (Fontein Cave) didn't offer the same opportunity for exploration, but the ranger suggested we walk down a path to find the freshwater stream and stick our feet in the water. Kind of weirded out, but more curious, we found the stream and a tour group laughing with their feet in the water. Tiny Tilapia fish were nibbling their feet and toes - Free pedicure. Krissy dipped in and giggled at the strange tickling sensation. More goats appeared - drinking from the stream.

The exit toward route 7 wasn't as smooth as the alternative entrance we had taken. Every 50 feet or so the road suddenly dipped down and then rose back up steeply (for water drainage). It wouldn't be a challenge in a Jeep, but we were in the little Toyota Yaris... nothing Andrew couldn't manage with some clever maneuvering. And when he didn't manage and we heard scraping of front bumper against pavement, I pretended to have heard nothing. Thankfully, the front bumper had already been scraped before us!

Moving up the northern tip of the island - California lighthouse (Faro California) and bathroom facilities for $1 USD - Andrew really had to go go. Decent panoramic views! We couldn't wait to get in the water. Drove to Boca Catalina beach - 1 of 3 recommended snorkel sites in the area.

The sun was shining, but the visibility was poor. Still enjoyed chasing around a cluster of cuddlefish. Feeling refreshed, we drove by the strip of high end high rise hotels - an area with A LOT of shopping. Back past the cruise port and through downtown Oranjstad (which was bumper to bumper busy by 1 PM) to find our way to Mangel Halto for another snorkel. The clarity was perfect and the waters shallow (with a strong current pushing us around), but the sun slipped behind dark clouds. With rain threatening and the afternoon slipping away, we headed back to the ship to drop off the rental car after re-fueling (and battling 1 way streets in traffic). Spent a few minutes walking the boulevard along the main street, stealing some free WiFi, then raced back onto the ship just in time.

Day 16 (Day 12 at Sea) - December 8, 2017

Even without the alarm, we woke before 7 AM. What better way to start your relaxing day, then joining the 7:30 AM Abs Express class. Looking for a challenge - try holding side planks on a moving ship...

After realizing Andrew was still unable to run again today... our morning transitioned into a series of visits to the Spa, Medical Facility, and Guest Relations. Apparently the Thai Massage had done wonders for Andrew's back, but injured his knee with a forced hyper-extension stretch. Celebrity was great - refunded the massage and waived the 5 minute $150 USD medical fee. You should have seen Andrew's face sink as the physician suggested his last 2 days of the cruise be all rest paired with muscle relaxants and NO alcohol. So... we negotiated an alternative plan - ice and rest plus self-medicating with Andrew's favourite liquors and keeping the muscle relaxants as a "just in case" it gets really bad option.

A forced first for us on the cruise - using the elevators - because Andrew could barely walk. Always an awkward experience - crammed into a confined space with others completely violating your personal space (and Canadians really like their personal space); trying to break the silence with 10 second intervals of witty banter as the elevators stopped on every level for more passengers to squish on. We quickly reverted to an option with space and fresh air... the stairs. Our perfect height difference allowed Krissy to become my personal crutch! We slowly walked down the stairs to avoid the congestion (and sick congested people) in the elevators.

Dropped by the future cruise office on Deck 4 to pick up brochures and a quote on the 2019 Galapagos Cruises - a bit steep on pricing, so may have to consider alternatives until we win the lottery (which we don't play). There are some perks to booking your next cruise while onboard, but not knowing where or when we would go; we will wait and do more research (knowing we may end up paying a bit more later and/or lose out on extra onboard credits). Instead, our attention was drawn to the excitement of the Corning Museum Glass Blown Art charity auction. After having watched so many glass blowing shows over the past 2 weeks, we felt invested in the success of the fundraising. While we weren't in a position to bid big, we made sure to cheer and applaud those who were to encourage larger bids to raise more money!

Back up to the lawn to watch at least 2 other cruise ships chase after us... or maybe the ships were trying to avoid the dark ominous clouds and rain we were cruising into. With a downpour looming, we escaped indoors and couldn’t help but grab paddles to compete in ping pong. It got a little heated - somehow the ping pong ball ended up flying over the glass and bounced 3 decks down... game over! Perfect excuse to sneak back to the room for a movie before an evening of martinis (and scotch), the incredible modern acrobatic theatre performance Euphoria, goodbyes to our favourites - Claire and Ljuben in Moonlight Sonata. We enjoyed dinner at our favourite onboard specialty restaurant Murano - with Adrian and Rubincho (who turns out to be Ljuben's roommate) and the comedy act Carl Banks back in the theatre.

Day 18 (Miami, FL to Atlanta, GA) - December 10, 2017

Best decision yet: Self-disembarktion! Meaning we didn't need to tag and put our bags out the night before, instead we took our luggage and selves to Deck 5 as soon as the ship had been cleared by port authorities and literally walked right off the ship and breezed through customs as the first passengers to disembark. Within 10 minutes we had gone from being on the Celebrity Eclipse to being in our vehicle and heading for the I-95 North. The convenience of parking beside the cruise terminal made the $20/day fee completely worthwhile. There was no baggage claim delays and lengthy wait for shuttles to distant parking lots.

Traveled North on Florida's Turnpike - thanks for the Toll Road suggestion Google Maps. Stay tuned for the financial damage...

Tonight's destination - Atlanta, Georgia (9h 15min away)

Hours of billboard reading - the signage is unavoidable - rising up higher and higher competing for air space. Themes developed - sex, gambling, liquor, lawsuits, and fast food. Over and over... then add anything Peaches once we entered Georgia. "You're a Peach" became our slogan for Georgia.

Of all the gas stations and rest stops we could have chosen... we chose Stucky's. Located right off the highway in Georgia with fully tattooed and pierced service attendant and random bouncer like guy hanging around - a real special kind of experience. The kind of place that suddenly makes you feel able to hold that pee you've needed to take for the last hour... it's only 65 more miles to the hotel.

Stopped at a Kroger, minutes from Hwy 75 just off highway 20, for groceries. Stepped out of the car and saw something unexpected (for Georgia) - snow... and not just a dusting. Canada's weather following us into the USA? (Apparently so... just like it did when we were in Australia).

Pleasantly surprised by the DoubleTree Galleria! Not excited by the mandatory valet parking ($12 USD), especially since the parking spots were steps from the entrance. Loved the spacious hot shower, free internet to research tomorrow's bourbon and BBQ plans, and the soft comfortable bed. It made it too easy to fall asleep after a nearly 10 hour drive day.

Day 19 (Atlanta, GA to Louisville, Kentucky) - December 11, 2017

Today might be more anticipated and exciting than Christmas - at least for Andrew. Without a doubt, if you want to put a smile on Andrew's face... plan a trip for authentic BBQ and bourbon (or scotch and whiskey). What better place - and convenient detour on our way back to Canada - than Louisville, Kentucky! ...and Kentucky makes it easy with their website: https://www.kentuckytourism.com

Aiming to arrive by lunch, we were up by 5 AM and driving by 6:30 AM. Apparently the night valet had fallen asleep somewhere... so we had a small delay until the valet brought the car around and the ice thawed - it was a balmy 34 F (nearly freezing) this morning.

Through Georgia and into Tennessee by 8 AM - a touch of traffic through Chattanooga on 75N. Clearly Tennessee nixed the billboards; without the obscene distractions, the picturesque valleys and escarpments along the scenic parkway (Hwy 111) could be appreciated.

Before 11 AM we passed over the state line into Kentucky and arrived a couple hours later at the Makers Mark Distillery in Loretto.

With 52 distilleries in Kentucky and more barrels of whisky (6.8 million) than people, just one distillery was at the top of Andrew's list. For $12 each, we joined a Maker's Mark Distillery sampling tour. Here whisky lacks the 'e' to denote the family's Scottish history. Christopher, and his southern accent, narrated the tour and described the basic process. First, the mash: limestone water, backset, corn, and wheat mingling at various temperatures for 3.5 hours. Next, 3 days of fermentation after the addition of yeast (which converts sugar into alcohol). The entire tour was invited to dip fingers into the various vats, which each make a small batch (19-23 barrels), and sample the bubbling sweet-sour pungent scented liquid. Next, the fermented distillers alcohol is poured into a copper 5 story tall 'still' to remove impurities (like phosphorus which would otherwise impart a bitter quality). Then, another 'pot still' (nope, not that kind of pot - no marijuana is used in the making of Maker's) is used to remove more impurities before being barreled and stored and hand roll rotated in a multi-level Rick House for 6-8 years before bottling in large batches (178 barrels pooled together). It's here that the Angels take their share (10% loss due to evaporation). Sampling for taste occurs at 5 3/4 years... With time, it's the single use Oak Barrels and nearly 30° fluctuations in daily temperature in Kentucky that impart the flavours.

Before sampling the incredible caramel and vanilla flavours of Maker's Mark, the tour highlighted the $7 cost of a bottle in 1978, passed by the dye cut printer (replicating the originally hand torn labels), and observed the liquor being dispensed, labelled, and hand dipped in red wax. Every bottle is hand dipped at this location - no matter where in the world it's found. Supposedly the red wax, bottle shape, and name (originating from the stamp or maker's mark on the bottom of pewter silver) was all the Mrs' idea and the Mr took a great deal of convincing, but eventually conceded.

In a tasting room, the tour (and guide) sampled 5 varieties of Maker's Mark, including Maker's White (moonshine), Original Maker's Mark, Maker's 46 (the son's contribution - apparently he liked the 46th recipe the best with its addition of 10 French Oak staves and extra 9 weeks in barrels in a limestone cellar), Maker's Cask Strength, and Private Select "Taste Panel". It is rumoured that $15,000 will buy the opportunity to create your own recipe, 250 bottles of it (1 barrel), and cellar storage space as part of the "Private Select Program".

The Cask Strength and ever-changing Private Select options are not currently available in Canada... so these became Andrew's newest addition to the collection. The best part was the ability to hand dip your purchases. Suited up in safety gear with Christopher standing by to assist, Andrew dipped into the red wax to customize his Maker's Mark... and Andrew was quickly dubbed a "Deep Dipper" ; )

Thirty minutes later we arrived in Louisville (pronounced Lu-e-ville silent 's' by locals). We're not sure why, but in our heads when we thought of Kentucky this came to mind - Bourbon and BBQ. With dozens of bourbon distilleries - we got that part right. And... there is BBQ - we ate at Doc Crows (because the highly recommended 'Feast' on Market Street is closed on Mondays) and shared a smoked meat sampler plate with some southern sides like mac 'n cheese (for Andrew) and gluten free collard greens and cheesy grits. BUT it wasn't quite the fall of the bone delicious we envisioned. Kentucky uses dry rubs and even their wet ribs were conservative on the sauce. It turns out that Tennessee and Texas might be better southern states for all things BBQ.

Day 20 (Kentucky to Niagara Falls, Ontario) - December 12, 2017

I thought it was sleepless in Seattle, not Louisville... anyway - up and out before 6 AM after receiving a discount for the room's "character" during our stay.

Less than 9 hours of driving on the agenda. As we approached Cincinnati before 8 AM - in freezing rain and midweek traffic, we were reminded why we go on vacation - in an attempt to avoid traffic and bad weather... ahhh! Back to reality...

Well before Columbus, the temperature plummeted and rain shifted to snow. So... progress was slower than expected.

An hour away from our Niagara Falls (Canada) DoubleTree destination, we needed a break. Decided a Starbucks Passion Tango Tea would be just the thing we needed (...and a clean bathroom). Funny thing about Google Maps, we added a stop for the closest Starbucks, but didn't realize where it would take us. We ended up smack dab in the middle of Fredonia - New York State University. Sure enough - Starbucks (and clean bathrooms)... we just had to blend in with all the 20-somethings on campus. Actually with Andrew's pigment-challenged white hair, we decided he was a professor!

Social Media Accounts